In one year, can life change? In one year what achievements and successes have made you stronger or braver? What let you down, tripped you up, disappointed or stressed you? What challenged your very motives and reasoning. Your ethics or the most important core values you hold?
But does life really change? Or are we the ones that change. Are we the ones that might see things differently, when time moves on from one season to another?
In this past year, I can now say that in one year, from one event or a series of events, life can change. And if you are true to your-self, if you allow it, you can change. I say all this, not to preach and not to convince anybody, but simply, to find a land mark for my own journey. Its been a massive past 12 months and to look back and remember the events of these months, is something that brings both pain and satisfaction.
Living in Africa is a challenge and some days are certainly harder than others. There can be days when I question my own motives and quest for a new humanity.Then there are the many days when the very work, the children and job satisfaction, bring me to my feet to motivate me to pursue something that I can see in my mind and heart. Its a collition and its a fight. To see something through, you more than often have a to fight and run after it with all that is within. Vision and passion are things I hold close, as the recklessness of past experiences and abuse, have caused me to be cautious and guarded. Yet to live life in the present and to be as courageous as I can, is what keeps me alive. When I left NZ, I came from a place of frustration and anger. A place where I didn’t feel I fitted in with much in life. Things were hard and didn’t make much sense. But through this past year of pushing my personal limits and finding something tangible to grasp and believe in. Life has come. Different people have walked in. New opportunities have grown. And everything has changed.
Today I have been remembering the murder of our director and friend James Njuguna. Its one year today and the sadness of a life lost still remains. He was shot in Nairobi just outside his house and it was an incredibly hard grief to go through at the time. James believed in our work at KCC before I even realized how big our vision would be. He was inspiring and he was true. He had many gifts and countless people had had the pleasure of knowing him. Today I remember him as someone who saw something in life that was bigger than himself, and from this, I have experienced the best adventure of my life and I wouldn’t exchange it for anything else in the world.